March 2012
265 posts
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I hope Rick Santorum spells Tracie’s name wrong.
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I hope Rick Santorum gets banned from Jezebel.
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I hope Rick Santorum gets rebaptized by a Mormon.
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I hope Rick Santorum meets his childhood sports hero…who turns out to be a total dick.
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I hope Rick Santorum gets halfway to the office and then realizes he left his laptop at home.
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I hope Rick Santorum misses his exit, and it’s 20 miles to the next one.
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I hope nobody “likes” Rick Santorum’s latest Facebook update, even though he thinks it’s really clever.
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Like, you’d look at his shop page, and it would say:
Store opened July 16, 2008
0 Sales
And he’d always be posting on Etsy forums asking for advice about SEO and shop critiques.
dialling-footnoterphone replied to your post: I hope nobody buys anything from Rick Santorum’s…
I literally LOL’d
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I hope the little girl on line in front of Rick Santorum gets the last chocolate frosted donut.
I hope nobody buys anything from Rick Santorum’s Etsy shop.
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I hope Rick Santorum has to wait for them to brew a whole new pot of coffee at Starbucks.
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I hope Rick Santorum forgets the words to the national anthem on live television.
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I hope Rick Santorum forgets his wallet at home and nobody will spot him lunch money.
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I hope Rick Santorum’s ski vacation gets ruined by unseasonably warm weather.
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I hope Rick Santorum leaves the iron on.
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I hope the next time he takes a drink, all the ice in Rick Santorum’s glass breaks loose and hits him in the face.
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I hope Rick Santorum tries Zumba and everybody laughs at him.
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I hope Rick Santorum develops an allergy to communion wafers.
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I hope they stop making Rick Santorum’s favorite Girl Scout cookie.
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I hope all of Rick Santorum’s favorite movies and television shows got dropped by Netflix Instant.
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You know that dream where it’s the end of the semester, and you’ve got a final exam tomorrow for an advanced calculus class that you haven’t been to all semester?
I hope Rick Santorum has that dream every night for the rest of his life.
February 2012
251 posts
scoldylox asked: Thank you so much for the info! When I premier as a ballerina, I shall dedicate every plié to you. ;)
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Foot & Ankle Strengthening Exercises for Scoldy
Because I’m nerdy about this stuff, and it’s TL:DR to fit in a reply.
In my opinion, ballet barre exercises are the absolute best for strong feet and ankles. But if you don’t have the time or inclination or money for ballet classes, here are a few alternatives and things you can do at home.
Do you have any Thera-bands? They’re great for ankle exercises. Gaynor...
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Shareholder Meeting in 15 Minutes
Plenty of time to prepare.
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Detroiters Whose Opinions Mean More to Me Than Kid...
Aretha Franklin
Jack White
Eminem
Kwame Kilpatrick
Bill Laimbeer
The Ghost of Henry Ford
Don Cherry (Honorary, Ontario Neighbors and such)
The Ghost of Tim Horton (Honorary, see Don Cherry supra)
The Ghost of His Honor Coleman A. Young
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Rather than Lincoln Hawk, I call them “Ladyhawke.”
If you even know what I’m talking about, you should be ashamed of yourself.
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No Thank You, Apple
You do not autocorrect “whisky” to “whiskey.” You obviously do not know the damned difference.
I fucking do.
That will be all.
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Truth.
theraconteurasaurus:
wailingbeansidhe replied to your post: I’m writing several letters of recommendation for a former student.
Shit is officially fucked up and bullshit.
Which can also apply to why, after they spent an hour fixing my lock, they needed another hour and fifteen minutes to, you know, actually fix it.
Time to pull this out again.
OCCUPY THE RACONTEURASAURUS’S SMALL...
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There is Water at the Bottom of the Ocean
I hadn’t been there in a long time, and then I went back recently and (once I remembered and dusted off my password) there were points next to my name.
And I found myself behind the wheel of a large automobile.
And I found myself in a beautiful house, with a beautiful wife.
And I was like, “Well, how did I get here?”
(Actually I’m just wondering what they’re for,...
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P-Mag People
What’s the deal with the points?
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I appreciate that my secretary is not afraid to stand in the hallway and participate in the loud trashing of Mitt Romney with me, particularly when we are, as we are, but a Tiddly Wink shot away from the Mormon Vatican.
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If The Artist was so great, why does this awards show involve sound and dialog?
glossylalia:
Saving Face lady has a flawless outfit.
Best dress of the night. By far.
Brit won?
Yiss!
But I missed it because of the goddamn NBA All Star game.
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True Story:
I dated a guy for six months because he told me I looked like Cate Blanchett.
OMG CHRISTOPHER GUEST CAST
scoldylox:
All of these things happening on my television at this moment are wonderful.
Haha, I was thinking SCTV. Needs more Rick Moranis.
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Please do!
I’d rather you got it than some no-good stranger.
hijabeng replied to your post: A Bother
Tell me, babe. I’ll eat up all the good food for you.
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A Bother
There’s a bottle of water in my sight line that says “Aquavista” and whenever I see it, I mis-read it as “Acquista,” and that makes me angry.
Because I do not have access to good Italian food in Queens right now, and quite frankly, I could do without the reminder.
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I’m not even going to discuss what passes for men’s businesswear in Salt Lake. If I got going, my assessments could very likely be misconstrued as verbal hate crime. I’ll just leave it at “Mr. Mac” and hope you get the reference.
If you don’t get it, consider yourself lucky.
(Hint: at a break during my first arbitration in Utah, a very LDS client said, of my...
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I realize I filter most things through my own perspective, but white male lawyers are probably the last people I can imagine pulling these off. (And yes, I saw these in an Esquire fashion trends feature, but I only ever read Esquire ironically.) It was imagining these on actual men I work with that took me from Level One Amusement to Level Nine Theatre of the Absurd.
maritsa-met replied to...
P.S.
I am not trying to police anyone’s fashion, and I have more than one pair of men’s oxfords in my own shoe rotation right now.
But I can’t stop LOLing at the idea of Cole Haan’s most likely demographic for these things—white dudes who read Esquire—wearing any of these shoes.